Encourage

Lately I've witnessed mothers being critical of their children or of other mothers.  I know I've been guilty of this too.  It's been on my heart recently to knock it off.  Being is a parent is the hardest and most rewarding role I've ever played.  I see the sweet side of our girls and I see the defiant side of them.  For some reason I've been chosen to guide them through this life.  The mere thought of that can paralyze me and excite me all in the same breath.

There is enormous pressure to ensure that your children have the values you want them to have, to be independent and to believe in themselves.  Because this parenting thing doesn't come with a manual, I'm going through these waters without a compass.  I'm human, which ensures that I'm going to make mistakes.

It seems that there are study after intellectual study about how much we're messing our kids up.  If you let them watch television, they'll have no attention-span and be sloths.  The next study says that television can encourage this or that.  If you give your kid dessert, they'll be addicted to sweets for the rest of their life.  While you're at it, cut out all flour. 

There's so much noise out there that says "if you aren't doing this, your child will be messed up permanently."  I don't know about you, but I put enough pressure on myself as a mother, I don't need everyone else doing it too.  I especially don't need other mothers criticizing my choices simply because they're different than the choice they would've made.  Honestly, being a mom is hard.  I beat myself up more than anyone else can about what I am or am not doing for my girls.  I sometimes struggle to even think that I'm a good mom. 

I don't understand why, as mothers, we're in competition with each other.  What is that going to accomplish?  There is no medal for the mom who spent the most time with her kid or the mom who didn't let her child watch television.  Being a mom isn't actually about me.  It's about my girls.  None of them are alike.  What works for D doesn't work for E and both of those things don't work for Zoe.  They're each an individual.  Yet I'm one mom. 

If you're a mom, believe that you're being the best mom that you can be.  Believe that, no matter how challenging this phase is, you're doing the best that you can.  If you give your best to this role that God has given to you, then you're doing a fantastic job. 

Mothers, let's not knock the other mom down.  What is that teaching our daughters?  Let's be encouraging, supportive and listen to each other.  Let's pray for each other.  It'll get us farther along on this journey than cutting each other down.