I Tapped Out For a Bit

Apparently when life gets a little chaotic, this blog suffers.  Honestly, I meant to keep better record of our life, but let's face it that was a pipe dream.

In the last few weeks, we've:

1) moved
2) started Pre-K
3) started AWANA
4) lost all track of time

The biggest happening that really feels like a month in the making is the move.  We had to do a three-point move.  My mom cleaned out her house and got ready for Zoe and I to move in.  I had to pack up our house for either my mom's house or for Oregon.  N moved into a duplex in Oregon.

It was much cleaning, packing, cleaning, de-junking, packing, sorting, packing, moving and moving.  We rented a truck for the big move last weekend.  In a sad commentary, the truck was too small, so not all our stuff fit in it.  We're having to do the remainder piece mail and it's ugly.  These last 48 hours have been the first of our new routine.  Because we're still unpacking, sorting, cleaning, unpacking it's taking a little longer.  This weekend is a big clean out of the old house and getting it ready to go on the market.

With the move has come some emotions.  We have a duplex that N's living in that has enough storage for all our stuff, so that's the great news.  It's a little place that's ours.  However, it's about 180 miles away from me.  That's been hard to lose my home.  I find part of my identity in my home and it's not a place that I live in daily.  I'm not complaining, this is just a stepping stone to a future where I can have a home that we hopefully build and then I can make up for these two years!

Zoe has adjusted quite well.  Her perfect place is where all her people are under one roof.  I honestly think if she could have a house that had rooms for the entire family, she'd be a happy girl.  She loves her new rooms, both at grandma's and in Oregon. 

In a nice blessing, Toby has also adjusted quite well.  He's come out of his shell and is total puppy.  We have a hard time getting him to come inside, which was absolutely NOT the case at our prior house.  Apparently Grandma's is also his happy place.  I can't even begin to explain how awesome that is.  We were worried he'd take several steps back and it's been a painful process to get him out of his shell.  Praise the Lord that he feels more at home at grandma's then he did at our home!
In the midst of all the packing and change, we started Pre-K.  Zoe LOVES it.  She's got 24 kids in her class and she's making new friends.  Zoe is a picky eater.  She only drinks water.  She isn't too keen on very many veggies or fruits.  She's stubborn.  After the first day of class she was SUPER excited because she tried something new:  a carrot.  She now claims them as one of her favorite foods.  Go Zoe!

In the midst of all the change, there are so many blessings.  N still loves his dam job.  He's making great friends and passing all his exams.  If we have to live apart during the week, it's such a blessing that he still likes what he does.

That's our life in a nutshell.  Nothing terribly exciting just terribly busy!

Ain't No Match For the Jaws of Life

Now that N is back at work at the dam, I'm having to do more around the house during the week since I'm a single parent of two now.  Zoe is her usual, only child self and requires that we play together, which is fine, I can do that.  I love hanging with my kiddo.  New the family dynamics is Toby.  Honestly, he's sometimes more high maintenance than a human.  He whines when I'm playing with Zoe and not with him.  He herds me away from Zoe so I can play with him.  He will try and sit on my lap when I'm cuddling with Zoe.  He's got all kinds of ideas that revolve around him being the center of attention and not Zoe.  It's sibling rivalry to the extreme. 

Toby is a chewer.  Praise the Lord, he only chews on his toys.  If we get him a stuffed animal, he'll have the stuffing out within the day.  If we give him a bone, he's gnawed off an end of it before the hour is over.  The boy chews and chews and chews.  I'm not complaining because he has only chewed two things he shouldn't have.  I think that's a great record.

However, because he's such a chewer, we are constantly having to get toys for him.  He loves stuffed animals with a squeaker in them.  They make him happy.  We took stock out of these 4-pack of animals that they had a Costco because we got 4 of them and we could make them last 10 days if needed!  The last ladybug is holding onto her last thread and we thought we'd pick up some more this weekend so that Toby would have something to chew this week.

They didn't have them anymore.  They did have these toys called that were appropriately named Tuffy.  They are for aggressive chewers and they're machine washable.  Because God was smiling, they also had squeakers in them, which are Toby's favorite.  We bought a pack thinking that maybe these would last longer than 24 hours. 

Then Toby showed us just how much of a misnomer the word Tuffy was.

Last night I was in the kitchen and in comes Toby making this weird sound.  Then he puked.  It was black.  I'll tell you there's nothing worse than seeing your dog puke and knowing that your husband isn't home to clean it up...until you see it's black and you start to wonder why.  Then you see this:

The Tuffy has been destroyed, eaten and puked back up, all within 24 hours.  I fear for the things that are on the receiving end of that mouth.  I think I'm going to start calling him Jaws rather than Toby. 

Friday Five Faves - The Memory Loss Edition

When I started this blog I started doing Five Favorite Friday where I would list out my weekly top 5. For 30 installments, you got my thoughts. Then suddenly, in 2009, I stopped. I'm not entirely sure why. Lists are like oxygen to me. They are my security blanket in this adult life. At least that's the story I weave, when in reality I think I just need gingko biloba to help with memory. I cannot tell you how many times (mainly because I can't remember) I've gone into a room to grab something and have completely forgot why. Not even retracing steps helps jog my memory. On Tuesday I called my mom with something important to tell her and now, on Friday, I still can't remember what it was.

In honor of my recent and alarming memory loss, I'm making a Friday Five Faves list today. I have a feeling next week, I may not remember anything about this week.

1. Caramel Macchiato - I have a new favorite drink at Starbucks.  Please don't read this as my darling peppermint mocha has lost all the love.  However, the caramel macchiato is my new favorite.  It's great hot.  It's great iced.  It's one of the lowest in terms of calories and fat.  I'm a gold card member at Starbucks, which if you've been on here for any length of time, you shouldn't be surprised.  For every 15 drinks that I purchase, I get a card in the mail for a free one.  On a whim, I decided to try something different.  The rest is history.

I'm actually drinking one right now.  "It's so good, once it hits your lips, it's so good."  (Name that movie!)

2.  People Weekly online - I check this site out once a day.  Okay, sometimes more than once a day.  It's my guilty pleasure.  Not really because I care what Kim Kardashian did at Vera Wang last night, but because it gives me a glimpse into a fake reality.  I love seeing what celebrities wear or who is dating whom.  Not because I really care, but because I find it fascinating.  It's a world that is so far removed from mine, that it's like a soap opera.  My favorite thing is the 10 Best Quotes of the Week on Fridays.  It makes me glad no one is keeping record of what I say.  Wait, what's a blog again?  Hmmm... 

3.  Zoe's maturity - My child fascinates me every day, but for some reason this week I've seen a real maturity in her that warms my heart.  Her sayings are hilarious, in a grown up way.  She was at the store the other night and the cashier gave her a sticker.  Zoe's response, "thank you.  You just made my day!" 

At drama practice on Wednesday night, we always start with a prayer.  Zoe sat in the front and asked if she could pray.  I said my prayer and then she said hers.  "Dear Jesus, thank you for today.  Please bless this play and thank you for letting me play.  I love you.  Amen."  The pastor asked if she could pray in front of the whole church on Sunday.  Zoe responded, "does that mean I get to have a microphone?" 

4.  Thursdays - It's the day N returns to the homestead!  It's our favorite day of the week.  We count down the number of sleeps until daddy comes home.  Then we go grab ice cream before we go pick him up.  Then, as N pulls up to our meeting spot, Zoe starts yelling for him even before his car has stopped.  It's the best, biggest smiles of the week.  It's a bright spot in our new routine.

5.  No more poop - Toby has been a hard dog to train.  He came from a home with 18 other dogs, they never went outside, he pooped in the room he was in, ate in the same room, had no human interaction, had to fight other dogs just to get his food...okay you get the point.  For the first 10-12 weeks of his life, this is his reality.  No matter how hard we've tried, we can't get him to not be scared of outside.  Going outside to take care of big business (#2) has been a challenge.  He just thinks he can go inside the house (usually on a bed or the couch - aren't we so lucky), even though 2 minutes before he was outside taking care of little business (#1).  It's extremely frustrating and I was at the end of my rope with it.  Toby is really N's dog.  They've bonded and N can get Toby to do things I can't.  Unfortunately Toby has to do things with me now that this is our reality.

My mom found an article on how to train an adult dog who has been abused.  She offered me some advice from this article.  Even though Toby was a puppy when we got him, his reality created some unique fears and all the "puppy training" we've done hasn't resulted in any positive outcomes.  He won't even go to the backdoor and whine or anything, he paces.  If you're not watching him, an accident happens.  It's extremely frustrating.  I tried the advice that she gave me:

 - calling #1 and #2 a certain word - we use the word "business".  Everytime we go outside, it's "Toby, let's go take care of business." 

 - take a treat outside and give it to him outside when he takes care of business - he gets 1 treat for #1 and another treat for #2. 

 - we only use his favorite treat for business.  If he does something non-business related, he gets a separate type of treat for in the house.

 - when we give him the treat outside, we reaffirm that it's for doing "business." 

The results in these few changes this week are amazing.  He's taken care of all business outside.  He actually goes to the door and whines.  He's loving being outside.  He used to go outside, maybe do business and then sit by the door and whine until you let him in.  Now, he runs, plays and generally enjoys more than just the mat in front of the back door.  Zoe loves running with him and playing with him.  N was even surprised at how playful he seemed outside.

I think we still have a ways to go and I'm sure we'll have some missteps along the way.  I'm so proud of Toby for being such a quick study and coming out of his shell in the process.  I know he's okay with my change in the routine because he laid on the couch next to me, rolled onto his back and looked at me with that "please rub my belly" look.  He's lucky he's cute.

I hope you all have a memorable weekend.  I'm going to take lots of pictures of my weekend, not because we have anything planned, but because I think I'll need the evidence of our happenings to jog my memory.

Happy Friday.

Mamma is Finally Getting Some Sleep

We are into week 2 of our new normal.  Last week was N's first week back at work.  That means he works out of town for four nights.  He leaves on Sunday afternoon and returns on Thursday evening.  Last summer when we started this routine, it wasn't a huge transition for us.  He was working nights and going to school during the day.  I got to see him only on the weekends, except for the occasional grunt in passing in the mornings.  Zoe and I were used to doing things on our own.

That all changed last fall when N just did school.  He didn't have to work and just focused on finishing his last year of college well.  As a bonus, he was home every evening.  He joined the worship team and became a leader in AWANA.  We had an amazing nine months of growing as a family.  Our marriage is better than it's ever been.  His relationship with the girls is better than it's ever been.  God greatly blessed our time together.

Enter the new normal.  We've been here before, but this time is different.  I forgot how much I ran around in the evenings taking care of things.  I forgot how little I actually sat before.  I'm not complaining, I'm blessed to have a family to take care of.  It's just taking some getting used to.

Last week was rough.  Zoe missed her daddy and had a hard time sleeping because of her emotions.  Toby was completely thrown for a loop and was very upset with N.  One morning he even pooped on N's side of the bed.  Yeah, you read that right, he pooped ON.OUR.BED!  I can't even tell you how quickly that comforter was in the washing machine with bleach!

I was working on little sleep, lots of emotion and none of us really had a great week.  Then N came home, loved on all of us and things seemed to be right in the world.  Sunday afternoon I was bracing myself for the rough week ahead.  In our experience it takes about 6 weeks before the new normal because just normal.  During this time there is worry, lost sleep, stupid fights and many prayers.

I'm very happy to report, week 2 is so far a 180 degree turn of week 1.  Toby hasn't taken care of his business on our bed or in our house at all.  He's playful with me, sleeps through the night and is back to his Toby-self.  I can't even tell you how wonderful that is because N's the dog whisperer in our house and I just buy the dog food.

Zoe's going to bed all by herself without much wailing and gnashing of teeth!  She's sleeping through the nightm, which hasn't happened for at least 8 weeks.  She usually calls for me at least once a night.

Between Toby's adjustment and Zoe's sleeping, this mamma is getting some sleep.  It's amazing, but I'm not as teary or cranky.  Who knew!  Praise God for week 2, it's just what this mamma needed.

Mash-ups

Zoe's new thing, that she learned on TV, is to do mash-ups with words.  For example:

Awesome + bodacious = awescious

She thinks it's hilarious to make up her own words.  Last night we were getting ready for bed and she was laying in bed with daddy and Toby waiting for me.  They were playing.  Zoe grabbed Toby's paw.  She's always grabbing him and he's so fabulous with her.  I think she could jump on him and he'd just lay there.  N and I are afraid it might scare Toby and he'll nip at her.  N told her to stop grabbing Toby's paw because he might bite her.

At that moment, Toby licked her.

Her newest mash-up is:

bites + licks = b*tches.

She has absolutely no clue that's a bad word and she kept saying it over and over.  N and I were cracking up because her mash-up actually is a word, but not one we say.

N politely told her, through giggles, she should stick with bites and licks!

Playful

We've had Toby for about 5 weeks.  He came from a really bad home.  We were warned that it could take months for him to feel comfortable with us.  There was a possibility that he would never come out of his shell.  All these were things we were willing to take on because we just loved this guy.

For much of his time with us he's layed on his bed, only chewed on his toys and basically acted like an older dog rather than the puppy that he is.

Each day we pet him, challenge him and just smother him with love.  I'm happy to report, he's a puppy!  He'd rather run than walk.  He likes to chew on things that he shouldn't, like the cable remote.  He whines if you're not paying attention to him.  When we take him outside, he does this:

I would say we've got the best of both worlds.  He's the dog that will sit and be petted.  He's patient with Zoe and the other girls.  He's not a barker.  He's potty trained.  He's also full of life, ready to play and becoming quite mischievous. 

Whatta blessing this little guy is. 

Puppy Love

This weekend we celebrated three birthdays:  our Uncle Mike, my brother-in-law Jerry and my mom.  In order to celebrate as a 4 year old would expect, you have to have a party with 31 of your closest friends, play games and make sumpin!

It's really hard to convince a 4 year old that, once you hit a certain age, you don't do that anymore.  It's akin to telling her that her puppy is dead and Santa isn't real all in one day.  She just wants to pretend to be a baby all the time because then you still have many birthdays ahead of you rather than being one year closer to the death.  Apparently Grandma is only 24...no make that 25...no make that 48.  I guess she does have some time before the big parties stop.

In order to make Grandma's birthday official, she wanted to make a cake.  She picked out a chocolate cake and we got to mixing.  Zoe is anti-loud noise.  If there is a potential for a loud noise, she will run into her room, slam the door and wait for the blasted thing to stop.  What I learned this weekend was that Zoe is really just good practice for our getting Toby.  Apparently, when there is loud noises, he runs to his bed and hides too.

Fortunately he has someone in his life that totally understands.  Zoe went to give him hugs to make sure he was okay. 

I'm pretty sure there is nothing sweeter than seeing your child love her on her puppy so that you can lick the bowl in peace.

Wordless Wednesday...A Girl and Her Dog

We Are Now a Family of 6

I would like to introduce you to Toby.  We welcomed him into his forever family on Friday, February 18th. 

Since Zoe has been able to talk, she's been asking for a puppy.  Every night before bed, she asks again, if she can get a puppy in one more sleep.  A couple weekends ago she did her nightly routine of asking about a puppy and I told her, as usual, that we would see.  Apparently her campaign expanded because she started asking N during the day about a puppy.  We knew it was only a matter of time and since she's sleeping through the night and we are finally out of the baby stage, we thought it would be fun to get a puppy and lose sleep all over again.

We started looking online and came across a place called Priest River Animal Rescue.  They had some Blue Heeler puppies that were absolutely sweet.  One of them caught both N's and my eye.  They called him New Year.  We inquired about him and learned that he was one of 4 puppies rescued from a home with 16 other dogs.  He had no human interaction and had to fight large, adult dogs for food.  The house was covered in dog feces and trash.  Because of this he was absolutely terrified of humans and had been in foster care for the last 8 weeks to get him used to being around people.  His story absolutely broke my heart.  Both N and I knew that this was our puppy.

Because it's a rescue shelter, you have to go through an interview process.  Those 24 hours were absolutely terrifying.  We knew he belonged with us, we just hoped the rescue volunteers knew that too!  Fortunately they did. 

We went and got him a bed, a leash, some food, dog dishes and toys.  Zoe LOVED picking out the toys.  As we were leaving they had this bin of sock monkeys.  She insisted that he HAD to have one and that he would love it.  N and I weren't convinced, but we let her get him one. 

Apparently Zoe is a dog whisperer because this monkey is his absolute favorite toy.

It's also his security blanket.  Anytime he feels a bit scared or he's getting ready to fall asleep, he has to be touching his monkey.

It is the absolute sweetest thing. 

When he arrived at our home, he was terrified and kept his tail tucked between his legs.  Now that he's been with us for 24 hours, his personality is coming out.  He's mischievious, playful, loving and terribly sweet. 

Welcome home Toby.  We've been waiting a long time for you.  Especially N who has been wanting another boy in the house for years.  He wasn't willing to wait for all the girls to turn 40 before they are allowed to get married! 

Zoe is already planning your 1st birthday party.  That is if you keep your distance from her ice cream.  She knows you're curious, but she's a little possessive of her dairy products!