He's an ACE and So Is She

N returned home from his first week working on a dam.  He got home tired, hungry and beyond excited about his new career.

I made him put on the coveted, white, hard hat that I've heard so much about a pose for me.

The half smile doesn't fully show how thrilled he actually is.

A certain someone also wanted to try on the hat.

She's ready for her dam tour daddy!  She's also more than ready to have him home for her nightly story reading.  Mommy just can't get it right.

This is How We Roll

The first thing you do after celebrating your birthday and opening presents, is breaking in the presents!  Grammy and Grandpa sent the girls Razor scooters that actually spark. 

Fortunately we live on a small hill and on a quiet street.  The girls scooted up the road, just to ride down and laying down the spark.

I'm not sure a scooter than has sparking and smoking coming out the back.  Usually when that happens it would mean something is VERY wrong. 

These seem to provide hours of entertainment, so I'm not going to complain until something very wrong does happen.

In other, non-fire potential news, a certain someone has learned to pedal!

She only likes flat surfaces at this point, but my back already thanks her!

Another Year, Another Spare

Every year on the Saturday before Father's Day we have a joint party for D & E.  This year they decided to go bowling.  We loaded up the presents, the cake and all our months of practicing on the Wii and headed to the alley. 

Once there, we were ready for some action with our fancy, bowling alley, worn by everyone shoes.  Can I just tell you, the Wii really ruins you.  Real bowling is WAY harder than the Wii.  I was no where near a perfect game.  I only got 2 strikes.

Zoe bowled like a pro, D & E each got a couple spares and a strike apiece and N even practiced his special, curve balls.

They girls opened presents, we ate cake and made a great memory together.  It's a great weekend when you get to celebrate N one night and then D & E the next day.  Not that we need it, but whatta great reminder of how blessed we are.

He's Less of a Man Now

This weekend we celebrated Father's Day on Friday.  Zoe got to spend the entire day with her daddy.  They played some Wii Mario Kart, watched some Caillou and spent some time cuddling. 

When I got home they were showing me their silly hair:

I've got to say, I think it's the start of a new hair band.  N likes to play bass and Zoe LOVES to sing.  I think we could start something like the Partridge Family meets Guns 'N' Roses. 

Daddy left to get D & E so the whole Father's Day celebration could begin.  Zoe kept staring at him because of this:

It was like the man I married walked through the door.  Unfortunately my hopes and dreams of a family band were thrown away.  N made some excuse about the heat of the summer or some such nonsense. 

Even though the band thing is ruined, he can still make my heart flutter.

Thanks for the great Father's Day N.  You are worth celebrating any day of the year.  Rock band hair or not.

Fatherless to Loved

A few days ago I read an article online in Relevant magazine about the fatherless generation.  With Father's Day around the corner, the article struck a nerve with me.  Not because of the timing, but because I'm part of this generation before it really became an epidemic.

My biological father didn't want a child and he left.  My mom and him weren't married, so leaving was something that could be done without any kind of legal issue.  It was the late 1970's and being an unmarried, pregnant woman was still something taboo in society.  My mom, being hurt, an outcast and left pregnant, decided to raise me on her own.  She was so strong in her conviction to be a single mother, his name isn't even mentioned on my birth certificate.  She didn't seek financial support.  He had made his intentions and desires clear.

Over the course of my life my mother never said a negative thing about him.  She allowed me to discover him on my own.  At age 15 I realized he still didn't want me.  That's no small issue for a teenager, let alone any age, to deal with.  It took me a decade to really come to terms with the realization that his lack of interest in me wasn't because of me, but because of his desire to live a life for him rather than for others.  As I say that, I really have no judgment in that statement.  He made his choice.  I hope he has a life that he's proud of.  I wish him nothing but good things.

That's not to say his choice didn't leave consequences in my life that, at times when I let them, can crush my soul in a way no other hurt can.  To not be loved or even thought of by your parent, whether your father or mother, is devastating.  Two people on this earth are supposed to love you unconditionally and when one doesn't it's hard to not take it personally.

There has been a ripple effect in my life because of it.  I never thought I was good enough for any guy to love if the one who was supposed to couldn't and didn't.  I'd be remiss to also say that it took a long time, even after we were married, to trust that N really loved me and wasn't going to realize one day that I was unloveable. 

One good consequence of my childhood was that I understood how important it was for my future husband to be a father to our children.  At the top of my must-have qualities, right after being a Christian, was the desire to be an active father. 

The first time I saw N after high school I sat and watched him play hide-and-seek with his daughters, who were 3 and 5 at the time.  D & E were freely given hugs, kisses, tickles and his time.  There was never a doubt that he loved and cared for them.  He made sure he actively told them so.  It was at that moment I realized I would marry him.  I knew it wasn't a show for me, it was who he was.  It was the first sign of his character that I witnessed.  It made me fall in love with him.

Now we have three daughters who will face peer pressures, grow up in a society that is selfish and be forced to make choices at younger ages than I ever had to.  I'm so thankful they have N in their lives.  He will give them a sense of security and unconditional love from the one man in their lives they can count on.  As a girl who grew up without that, I know the value of his presence, his time and his love.  It's something they will never have to question.

After almost 6 years together, it's not something I question either.

Thank you N for being you.  I know you have no idea the impact you have on our lives because it's just part of your character.  Trust me when I tell you, you are no less than amazing.  We are completely blessed to have your love.  Thank you for giving it so freely and unconditionally.  You have healed my heart in ways I can't accurately express.  You have entered the hearts of our girls in ways that will carry them through life without even knowing you're doing it.

We love you completely.  Happy Father's Day love.  You are one of a kind.

A House With Wheels

This is the last official weekend we have with N before the next chapter of our life begins.  I know that sounds kinda melodramatic, but it's true. 

For the last several years N has either worked two jobs or gone to school full-time and worked full-time.  We haven't seen much of him during the week.  In fact Zoe doesn't really see him at all Monday thru Thursday. 

This weekend begins a plan to change that.  On Monday N starts his new job with the Army Corps of Engineers.  Yesterday the RV we purchased to house him this summer down there hit the road with Tom, the other student to get the job with N. 

It's parked near the dam now waiting for them to return on Sunday and begin this new career.

For the next three months N will be working out of town and our routine will remain the same as it is now.  In September, when he returns for his final year of school, he'll be home in the evenings with Zoe and me.  This isn't something that's happened in her entire life.  We are excited.

While we don't know the difficulties we'll face with this new job or the new schedule, we do know it's where God wants us.  I couldn't be more excited to see what He has planned for us.  If this week is any indication of what our life will be like in the future, this summer is going to be a long one.

Good luck N and Tom.  I know you'll knock 'em dead!

Who Doesn't Like Cookies?

I have a list of blogs that I check in with daily.  Some of them are funny, some of them inspire me, some of them are written by people I know personally and love seeing what they're up to. 

Sometimes I read blogs where the person would never know me, but I feel like I know them.  I'm positive if I'm ever in their town, I could call them up, we'd have coffee and be great friends. 

One of those people is Jody Ferlaak.  She writes a blog called Nitty.Gritty and it's funny, charming and incredibly personal.  She shares the great times, the down times and her honesty is something like I greately admire. 

Yesterday I checked out her blog to find this post about some chocolate chip cookies from a big-named department store.  I highly recommend that if you like cookies, you read the story and enjoy the recipe. 

Stick it to the man Jody!  Thanks for the recipe!