I Have to Laugh

Sometimes it feels like life can really be a rollercoaster of emotions.  This season of our life could make even the most daring rollercoaster envious.  We are experiencing pressures from places/people/sides that we never anticipated.  It's been both sad and a reason to keep on keeping on. 

To distract ourselves, we try to steal away moments that give a some moment of serenity.  I am doing a Block of the Month quilt.  Basically, it's a year-long program where you do one block per month (hence the very clever name) and at the end of the year you have a quilt top.  June was the first month and I was super excited.  Not only is it my first Block of the Month quilt ever, but I love, love, love the fabric line:  Vintage Modern by Bonnie & Camille for Moda.  It's a little retro, a little bright, whimsical and so much fun. 

This is what I made:

I was so excited.  It took about 30 minutes and I got to quilt!  Then I looked at this picture and realized something was wrong.  Apparently, in my 30 minutes of "me time" I stopped reading directions and just slapped the thing together.  Now I have to take the top row out and put it on the right way so the red looks like a real pinwheel, not one that got put together by Picasso.

That's not really the big deal, but I showed this to my mom's quilt group before I realized that I can't read directions.  Bless those ladies, not a single one said anything.

Bless N, he didn't even notice! 

Another way we've been trying to steal time together is dates.  N is working only an hour from our house for a bit and I decided to head his way and surprise him for dinner one night.  He called on his way back to the hotel from work and I informed him that he needed to be ready to take me to dinner.  It's always fun surprising him because I can't usually pull it off.  We haven't been able to do during-the-week dates for over a year.  This was extremely special for both of us.

We went to a cute Mexican restaurant people at his work recommended.  The food was delicious.  We went back to the hotel to watch some television and just be.  It was wonderful.

Until...

We both got food poisoning.

I think I've learned some valuable lessons:

1) Always proof your work, even if it's a quilt square before you show it to all the seasoned quilters.

2) Always read directions a couple times.

3) Mid-week dates don't always work out the way you envision.

4) You know your marriage is made to last when you can be in a hotel room with one bathroom and you both have food poisoning.

5) Cute little Mexican restaurants aren't always so cute the next day.

I Ignored Life for 3 days

Lately I've been on a HUGE reading kick.  Which is ironic because if you had asked the 11 year old me if I would ever read for pleasure, she would've bet her first born that she would NEVER read for pleasure. 

The last books I was hooked on, like couldn't put it down, tried to sneak away hooked on was The Hunger Games.  Before that it was Twilight.  Don't hate, it's a good story. 

I find that I have a hard time getting into books without strong characters.  Apparently, I'm more along the Young Adult/Sci-Fi reader.  Which shocks me a little.  Perhaps there is some therapist who has some explanation for that. 

Several months ago, just after I finished The Hunger Games trilogy, Amazon sent me a recommendation for this book:

Along with several others that sound eerily like The Hunger Games meets junior high meets that would never happen.  Perhaps that's why I loved The Hunger Games - even though it is "that would never happen" they make you believe that it totally could.  So I bought Divergent because the story sounded good and I really liked the cover.  My refined selection habits are astounding!

Then it sat in my Kindle library for approximately 187 days.  After reading some other books and getting my reading mojo going, I thought, why not.  I'll give it 30 pages.  That's my strategy with any book; 30 pages and if I'm not hooked, I don't read it.  Anywho, I came up for hair about 5 hours later, lost precious sleep, and had to rely on Starbucks to get me through the next day. 

I had no idea it was the first book in a trilogy.  This is the second:

They are Young Adult/Sci-Fi, but not in that weird video game way where everyone is a zombie and they go by names you cannot pronounce.  It's YA/Sci-Fi in a way that you love the characters and think, "this could totally happen." 

Veronica Roth is awesome!  She's early 20's, wrote Divergent during college and now has a trilogy that is fabulous.

The third book of the trilogy doesn't come out until fall 2013. 

If you liked The Hunger Games trilogy, enjoy books that provide entertainment and strong characters, give this 30 pages.  It's can't put it down fabulous!

The Marriage Talk

For several months now Zoe has been concerned about getting married.  She doesn't want to move.  She likes where she is and wants to stay with N and I forever.  N tries to talk some sense into her by telling her that she isn't getting married for a long time and she might change her mind by then.  She then decides she's never going to get married and that means she can't be a mommy.  Which brings up a whole different level of discussion that, quite frankly, I'm not ready to have.  Especially since all this line of questioning is hilarious coming from a 5 year old.

I tried a different tactic.  I told her last night that she doesn't have to move.  Her husband could move in with us too.  Why not play along with her 5 year old reasoning?  It's like a light bulb went off.  She started making plans.  She needed to call Ben, who is the boy she's going to marry.  He's 5, goes to our church, comes from a lovely family and he's absolutely adorable.  She has good taste!

Last night this was her stream of thought:

I think I'll talk to Ben on July 9th, we'll get married on July 10th and they can move in here on July 11th.  Although we're going to need a bigger house if his mom and dad are moving in too.  How about we move into a bigger house with stairs on July 8th, then I'll talk to Ben on July 9th, we'll get married on July 10th and they'll move in on July 11th.  Grandma, you can be my bridesmaid who lights the candles on the right side and mommy you're the bridesmaid who lights the candles on the left side.  Daddy will be the ring master who brings us the rings.

I wonder what kind of ring Ben is going to give me?  I better start looking for that.

Mommy, can I borrow your dress?  We'll have to make it shorter. 

Oh my gosh, what about prom?  Can I still go to a prom if I'm married?  Maybe I'll just wear my wedding dress to prom! 

I'm so excited.  I'll have a slumber party with Ben and have someone to sleep with every night.  You know I'm afraid of the dark!

I think that's the real crux of the issue.  She's very jealous that I have daddy to protect me in the dark.  She needs a protector.  Instead of a nightlight, she's just going to get married.  Poor Ben, he has no idea what his summer holds!

The End

Today marks the last day Zoe will be in pre-kindergarten.  Actually all types of pre-schooling.  Next we enter the world of kindergarten and her schooling career.  It's an odd thing to realize.  To distract from all the weird emotions of this milestone, we made teacher gifts.

We painted a terra cotta pot black and wrote on it with a white paint pen to make it look like a chalkboard.  Then we planted a flower into it and made a card.  Inside the card it says, "thank you for helping me grow this year."  Zoe wrote her name and drew a sunflower.

Super cute, super easy. 

She's A Sparkie Now

Since the beginning of the AWANA year, Zoe has been counting down the patches until she's in Sparks with me.  Granted, it's based on age, not on how many sections you pass, but that's not as fun to countdown.  Especially since Zoe is the only child I've ever known who wished time went backwards.  She'd much rather be an infant than 6.  Her mother would much rather she be 6 than an infant.  I get WAY more sleep now.

Last night was the awards night for AWANA.  Zoe officially passed her Cubbies book, received a ribbon and flowers from daddy, who couldn't make it to the ceremony because of a class.

The whole night was spent talking about what happens in Sparks, what color team will she be on, does she actually earn money for the AWANA store, what songs we sing, what kind of games do we play, and that she's going to be my special helper.

I love that she loves AWANA.  It was one of my favorite things growing up.  She's just as eager to continue on with hiding God's word in her heart.  This mamma will take that any day!

Two Shirts in One Day

Saturday was a busy day for us.  Mainly Zoe.  The first weekend of May is a big one here.  We have the largest  timed road race in the nation that happens the first Sunday in May.  It's a big deal and this year 48,000 of my closest friends ran it with me.  For the youngsters they have the Marmot March.

It's a mile run through our downtown park.  They get a shirt they can paint, cheerleaders from every school cheering them on, mascots from around the area giving out High-5's and a ribbon at the finish line.  It's our third year of running and Zoe has a blast.  Her favorite part is the small loaf of bread she gets at the end, since Franz Bread is a major sponsor.  She prefers to do her carbo-loading at the end of the race.

This year she even found a friendly pirate in the park who made balloon animals.  She got a yellow poodle she calls Pinkie.  I think she tries to think of names that just mess with my head.

I'm pretty sure we could've gone home, sat around and watched The History Channel with N all day and Zoe would've been a happy girl with her shirt, ribbon, loaf of bread, Pinkie and the memory of 35-High-5's from the cheerleaders.  Combine all those things into one morning and pretty much the rest of the day is going to be ho-hum.

Not for this mom.  No way.  That was just the beginning to the Day-O-Fun!  On Saturday the Washington Dept. of Fish and Wildlife hosted their annual Fish In.  All kids, ages 5-12, could sign up for an hour of fishing, get a shirt and new fishing pole and spend that time trying to catch some trout.  They stocked the lake with 6,000 fish, so the odds were in our favor.

For days Zoe was asking, hoping, determined to get a pink fishing pole.  We were pleading, nudging, softening the blow that she may not get a pink pole.  It's not a girl's Fish In, it's a kid's Fish In and how many boys really want to get a pink pole?  This is manly stuff that includes worms, seaweed, fish and, if you're lucky, fish guts.  Pink fishing poles seem out of the norm.

We got to the lake at our appointed time, Zoe got her shirt and her pink fishing pole.  Sometimes I think God is just up there laughing!  The look on my face when they told Zoe to get her pink fishing pole was priceless.  She immediately looked at me and said, "I told you so Mom!" 

There were probably 50-75 other kids ready to catch their trout.  We tried the dock first, but since there were so many people on it, most of it was slightly underwater.  I'm all about lakes and water and just enjoying the moment.  For the Fish In, they hooked up nets to the sides of the dock so the kids would almost be assured to catch something.  I could see me getting pushed into the net with all the trout.  I enjoying holding a fishing pole and I enjoy the excitement from hooking one and reeling it in.  I do not enjoy any of the slimey stuff.  I don't touch worms or fish and I really don't enjoy being near fish.  I'll swim in a lake because I can't see the fish.  With all my neurosis, we went to the shore to try to hook one.

We were the people who were standing next to the guy who hooked HUGE rainbow trout.  Those fish had to be 10 pounds at least. 

Zoe kept catching seaweed. 

We got a little discouraged until Grandma got a bigger worm.  My grandpa was a big fisherman.  In the summers we'd head to a nearby lake, he'd get his boat motor out, rent a boat and troll for trout for hours.  I loved his fishing pole because the line was all different colors, so he knew how far down it went and it had all these shiney metal pieces on it so the fish would notice his line.  He got me my first fishing pole, a Snoopy one.  I drop it every time a fish would bite.  He'd laugh really hard at me.  I was very girly, even then.

One of his tricks was to spit on the worm for luck.  The second Zoe did that, she reeled in her first fish.  I use the term "reeled" loosely.  She dropped the pole, screamed "I CAUGHT A FISH", jumped up and down and then had N fishing the job.  She's got a bit of each of us in her!

It was the perfect day.

In the Waiting

It was a typical Monday drive to work today.  I got behind the drivers doing 5 miles under the speed limit and I hit every red light.  It was like every time I got a block ahead, I had to slow down or stop.  For the past few days, I've just been cranky.  This was not a good start to the day.

About 5 minutes outside of work, I made a green light.  I did a little happy dance because maybe my luck was changing.

Nope, at the next light, a block away, I got stuck for 5 minutes.  I've never seen these lights so off before and I was literally getting more and more agitated the longer it took. 

I finally made it into downtown, only to have three cars in front of me, going less than the speed limit. 

Just when I was ready to scream, I saw the car, three cars in front of me, get into an accident.  The driver in the lane next to him made an illegal turn and the driver in my lane T-boned him.

It was in that moment that God loudly spoke to me, "I am watching over you every second." 

In my normal morning commute, I'm usually in that front car spot.  I'm usually not held up like I was today.  Despite my crankiness, God was watching over me.

I'm trying to process much of what life is throwing at us and I'm failing at it.  I know God has His hand in our life and I know He's guiding our steps.  However, sometimes I can't see any part of His plan.  My limited understanding makes me feel uneasy.  I know most people would say that God is trying to teach me patience.  I really feel He's trying to teach me faith.  To fully rely on His power, His understanding, His plan. 

I am learning to let go.  Let go of my expectations.  Let go of my desires.  Let go of my hopes.  I'm needing to rest all of these things in His hands. 

Today I thank God for the slow drivers and the red lights.  It was His way of showing me to let go.