In the Tunnel

For awhile now N and I have been plugging along.  He's going to school to get a degree in a field he loves.  He's also in a job that doesn't pay him what he's worth.  To say the candle is burning at both ends is an understatement. 

Things for me haven't panned out the way I was led to believe they would.  It's frustrating and humbling at the same time.

We both know we're in a place that God wants us.  We both know He has a great plan on the other side of this.  We're just in the middle of that tunnel.  We can see where we've come from and we can see the light at the other end, but we're not sure of much else.

Without going into too many details, certain possibilities at the end of this tunnel are presenting themselves.  All of them give us hope, but they are drastically different from one another.  We're not sure which one of these possibilities is at the end.  We're not sure if these possibilities are at the end.

This schedule is hard.  We're tired.  We want some assurance that, at the end of all this, we will have been working toward something great.  Something we can tangibly see and experience.  We don't have that assurance.  The only assurance we have is that God is guiding us down His path.  We aren't guaranteed tomorrow or even this afternoon.  We are only guaranteed that He will be with us in this moment to get us to the next moment and the next.

Right now N and I have several possibilities before us.  We have to figure out which path is His path.  We've committed this to prayer.  Our hearts have a peace about the future.  Sometimes the noise of "what if" and "maybe" get in the way of that peace.  They are like an echo in the tunnel that turns our heads from the Light at the end.  It distracts us from getting through the present.