More pitter-patter

I remember in high school when I would hang out with N and his twin sister Bev, they had this little sister that was always around. Growing up as the only child in my house, the whole concept of siblings was foreign to me.

Amanda is almost 5 years younger than N, so when we were 16 and she was 11, that was like decades different.

I don't really remember much about Amanda other than she was always around and so much younger than us, wise teenagers.

When N and I reunited 5 years ago, I was excited to see what Amanda was doing. She had met the love of her life and they got married in May of 2005. I was engaged to N at the time and she was gracious enough to ask me to be part of their wedding. She welcomed me into the family with open arms. Not just as a sister, but as a friend.

It only got better when Brian was stationed at a base here in Washington. They ended up being about an hour away from us on a good traffic day. We got to see them, fellowship with them and experience newlywed life together. It was a couple years that I truly treasure.

They were one of the first people at the hospital to comfort N during our ordeal. They were also the first to meet Zoe.

I've seen Amanda grow and mature over the last 5 years. She's no longer the 11 year old, little sister. She's my sister and my friend.

Brian is cut from the same mold as N. They are truly like brothers themselves. It is a joy to have found a couple you enjoy being around that isn't just your friends, but your siblings as well.

For the last several years they have been struggling with infertility. The struggling is over. We will have a Baby B in the spring of 2010. I got a little glimpse of that sweet little baby yesterday. Even though (s)he is only the size of a bean, it's one of the cutest beans I've ever seen.

We are beyond thrilled to see what God's plan is for Brian, Amanda and Baby B. They've gone through some challenging paths to get here. We are rejoicing with them. We know they will be amazing parents to any children God blesses them with.

Aren't they cute!

Congrats Amanda and Brian. It's killing me that I can't give you hugs right now. We will have lots of hugs for all three of you in a few short months. We love you all so much. God has truly blessed us with you.

Poppop is hiding at Target

I've been quiet on the blog because we have company. N's dad made a trip up to see us. We get him all to ourselves for the whole week. I don't think that's ever happened. Usually we are celebrating some wedding or birth. It is a special treat to have a visit with him just because we can.

Zoe hasn't seen Grandpa for about a year. She's not totally comfortable around people outside her inner circle. We've been in the church nursery with the same people for 2 1/2 years and she still doesn't feel comfortable in there without N or me. We were a little worried that she might not warm up to Grandpa until he was at the airport on Friday morning saying good-bye.

We found no comfort in the fact that on Monday, after Grandpa arrived, she stayed at her play kitchen, not looking at him, not talking and trying to hide behind the little counter.

She's a natural performer, so we were really hoping Grandpa would get to see our little ham in action.

I'm proud to annouce that she didn't disappoint. She's danced and sung Wiggles's songs, put puzzles together, hopped, jumped, climbed and as a grand finale put a napkin on her head at dinner and blew it off.

More of our real Zoe came out last night at Target. Grandpa wanted to go shopping to get the girls some outfits. He was looking at t-shirts on the other side of the department, while Zoe and I were looking at dresses. She turns to me and goes, "where he go?" I told her to call out "grandpa" and she did.

Although it's more of a Poppop. Which is ironic because that's what we call his step-dad.

Then all night, "Poppop" this and "Poppop" that. He's like her new best friend.

He's also in the inner circle. He got a hug before bed last night.

A gentle reminder

Things happen in life that gives you a moment of pause. In my case it doesn’t happen to be anything big or earth shattering, I ran into someone I haven’t seen in years. I met him when I was about 25, which was the best year of my life up until that point. I was a late bloomer and seemed to come into my own at 25. It was the age where I was finally comfortable with myself, content with my life and just wanted to meet new people and have fun.

As I was holding Zoe last night I began to think about the 25 year old me and what would my life be like if some of the things I wanted at 25 turned out to be reality. I would be married to someone who had a different set of beliefs than I do. That would be a recipe for disaster. I wouldn’t have three daughters in my life. I may not even have one. I wouldn’t have had some experience working for Russell Investments in Tacoma, which has proved to be one of the best career opportunities I could’ve ever had.

As I took stock of my life, I couldn’t see myself anywhere but where I am. I found incredible peace with that. Not that I’m at all questioning where God has me, but just knowing that this path God has me on is exactly where He wants me is a nice reminder.

Right now our life is hectic and exhausting. N is burning the candle at both ends to support our family and get a degree, which is something he’s always wanted and never thought he would achieve. That leaves Zoe and I home alone most of the week. There are times when working full-time and then being a single parent at night is overwhelming. I think I try to overcompensate by extending myself too much because I still want to feel like I’m giving Zoe the best life a 2 year old can possibly have.

I put quite a bit of guilt on myself about things I don’t do with Zoe that I feel like I should. It seems to have peeked the last couple weeks. That is because we’re nearing the end of this quarter with N’s school and I’m just exhausted. This summer quarter has been more intense than any other because they have to cram 11 week’s worth of material into 8. I’ve also been putting pressure on N to do more things on the weekends because we miss out on family time during the week. He’s just exhausted too.

I’m not sharing all of this because I want sympathy, but mainly as a reminder to myself. Right now life is exhausting, difficult and overwhelming. Yet it is the exact place that God had planned for me to be. I have things in my life that I never thought I would have or even deserved. Yet God knew.

I know He will get our family through these times. We have 4 weeks of no school coming up. We will have N all to ourselves for a whole month. I’m beyond excited to know that we will be a true family for exactly 28 days. It is the break we all need to get through the next 18 months of school, work, parenting and exhaustion.

God knows the plans He has for us (Jeremiah 29:11) and He will give us strength to continue on His path (Phil. 4:13).

I guess sometimes God uses a nice comment from a friend or running into someone you haven’t thought about in years to show you how He’s guiding you. I know there will be other nice comments and random encounters over the next year and a half that will help me gain the right perspective.

We can grow things

Zoe's first strawberry patch is actually producing fruit.

These were picked on Monday evening.

Now if I could get her to actually chew one rather just put it in her mouth.

It's like my worst nightmare come true

Since N was home on Saturday night, I put him to work at the grill. We decided some steak, potatoes and corn on the cob sounded delish. I also was able to find yellow corn. I'm not a big white corn fan and that's all I've been able to find for the entire summer. When I was at the store on Friday, I couldn't resist picking up some ears. Yellow corn on the cob is one of my favorite things ever.

I sent N out to the grill to heat it up. That's when he called me over to the door. Mainly because he likes to provoke all senses of fear in me. I think he figures I'll get used to outdoor creatures, but that's about as likely as self-cleaning mini-blinds.

This is what he wanted to show me.

Well that's not exactly what he wanted to show me. Two of the four jumped off between my screaming and this picture.

Apparently the frogs think our BBQ, while under the cover, is a safe haven. Granted, if I don't know they are there, it is.

I don't wish them harm, but I also don't wish them near me.

While N was grilling, I think he was showing them new places they could be safe. As I went out to water the flowers yesterday morning, I found two of them on the hose.

It could be worse, it could be snakes. That thought brings with it a sense of such fear that I can't even joke about it. I guess the frogs aren't so bad.

Don't let N know that.

Three times the size

As a child, I loved all those magic toys. Anything that would allow me to perform was good in my book.

When Zoe and I went to Michael's to get painting supplies, I saw these on their $1 aisle.

I couldn't pass them up.

I got a couple glasses of warm water. I knew Zoe would be amazed at the little pill turning into a sponge farm animal. Quite honestly, who wouldn't be amazed. A capsule the size of a multi-vitamin being able to contain a foam animal. It's like the 8th wonder of the world. You know, right after the Taj Mahal and self-cleaning mini-blinds. Actually I'm not sure it can compare to self-cleaning mini-blinds because if someone would invent that they would deserve a Nobel Peace Prize and most of my admiration. If you've never had to clean mini blinds consider yourself the luckiest person ever.

We put the capsules in the water and waited.

And waited.

And waited.

I know it's supposed to be amazing and all, but a 2 year old does not have enough attention to wait the 5 minutes it takes for a horse to suddenly appear.

Quite frankly, neither do I. I helped them along and we got a goat, rooster, sheep and something that resembled a horse that hadn't had a drink in about a million years.

He just looks sad about being the green horse in a capsule.

His life purpose was to make a 2 year old "nay" in excitement.

He should be proud, she won't even do that for me.

Summer Art Class

This week I decided Zoe and I needed an art project. We went to Michael's to get some supplies and came home to create.

I think our walls will never look better!